It was made public yesterday that the beloved Sesame Street will be leveled and replaced with a team of 50-storied luxury condominiums. This shocking news comes only months after the streets 40th Anniversary. The plans were announced Tuesday morning on PBS right before the show aired. It appears that the show’s executives, Bert Carr and Ernesto Johnson, forgot to renew the property lease. The new owner of this famed set is British real-estate developer Hartliss & Crool Inc. The notoriously corrupt developers have only begun their appropriately titled “death of innocence” plan. They have announced plans to turn Walt Disney World into what they describe as a “children’s only Las Vegas,” complete with showgirls, penny slots, and all-night juice bars. When asked what will happen to Sesame Street, executives said that it will relocate to Brooklyn, NY, and the show name will be changed to “Come Have Fun and Learn Spanish on Martin Luther King Jr. Boulevard”.
–Mister Polone, March 2010